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SHELL GARAGE: ANYTHING GOES (2026

 The purpose of this work is to explore the fear that comes along with transitioning.

Whenever one start the process of moving, whether physically, mentally, or emotionally. There is the possibility of the mind becoming overtaken by a suffocating notion of Isolation. A confined framework with the absence of ventilation and separation between the self. Thought is slowly polluted by emissions of doubt that seeps in like leaks from gas pipes, and second-guessing fuels pressure, resulting in self-sabotage and eroding self-esteem. Thus, the key to start the engine is paralyzed by anticipation, momentum slows and progress is hijacked.

After leaving the home, and moving in to a new apartment where spaces is shared by myself, I have spent quite some time occupied in headspace. It has become difficult to leave the settlement, as my mind races between anxiety and the need for a normal life. My mind has become a garage where every little trigger of uncertainly is stored. I am relearning to become myself again, like its my first time learning to drive a car. Almost everything is uncomfortable and overwhelming, it blows up my engine. Therefore,  I have to restart again, reversing headway. I have been travelling in and out hospital, and clinic hoping to get help into a healthy state, where I won’t feel the need for towing no more.

 Because right now, what was once movement has become hesitation, and I have become both occupant and enclosure.